God's Plan is Perfect: Part 3

Part 3:

I began sneaking out while my wife was at work and my son was at school. I didn't really do much except drive around the city while once in a while stopping at a grocery store to buy shit that we didn't really need. It was mostly fruits or vegetables so that it looked like I wasn't driving around for nothing. I wasn't exactly sure why I was driving around so much. I think, even with my limited mental capacity, that I knew it was inevitable that my independence would be taken away. I wanted to taste the last little drops of independence I had left before my glass was taken away. They were bittersweet to say the least. My wife eventually found out I was sneaking out though. At one point I wasn't sneaking out while my son was at school. I was sneaking out after I brought him home. It may not make sense to you but it made sense to a man with severe white matter damage. While he was busy with homework I would tell him that I needed to take a trip to the grocery store and that’s when I would “sneak out.” I don’t know who called who but she found out and wasn't exactly pleased with my actions. She scolded me a bit for not telling her, however she “let me have [my] independence” for a bit longer. Bless her heart…she always knew I was an independent man. Even in my ever-declining state, she knew that I still had my pride as a man. It didn't last very long though.

My wife and I had an argument over my driving abilities. It wasn't so much an argument as it was a lecture considering how difficult it was for me to articulate. She scolded me on how my perception isn't what it used to be and my reaction time is virtually nonexistent. I was clearly not to be trusted with the car anymore. You’d think that I would be angry at her. My driving privileges were being stripped right before my eyes but…I laughed. I don’t know why but I just laughed and laughed and laughed…it was unbelievable. In my mind I wanted to yell “Why the fuck are you doing this?! I have every damn right to be out on the road! You can’t just take the car keys away from me like that!” but what came out was an inexplicable chuckle that sounded like I was enjoying the verbal bashing. Why couldn't I tell her what I thought? What the hell was up with that laugh? My wife couldn't explain it either until years later when the frog was long past cooked.